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Friday, September 11, 2009

Facebook Would Be So Great If They Served Cocktails

Author's Disclaimer: If you are one of my Facebook friends, you may take offense to this post. Please don't. If you are happy to be a non-active Facebook member, God bless you. That's your right. If you don't feel the need to amuse me, that's ok. I mean, after all I've done for you, well I kind of hoped that you would at least give me a good laugh now and then, but then again, the world needs quiet, keep to themselves kind of people too, and don't worry, I won't hold this against you and un-friend you on Facebook or anything. It's ok. Don't worry about me. I'll be fine. I could probably use more sleep anyhow.

Ok, you've been warned. Now on to the post.

The guys who created Facebook really stumbled upon something, something I'm sure has provided them with a steady income and because they are probably already richer than Richie Rich I doubt they care if Facebook lives on for another 10 years or dies out, suffering the fate of other social networks that have gone before.

And it will die, because that's the eventual fate of internet sites, even Facebook. I think however, Facebook will die not just because it has run it's course, but because there was one teeny tiny detail the developers didn't take into consideration during the whole concept part of the project. Facebook is only as good as it's people. Your Facebook is only as fun as your facebook friends. And I'm here to tell you people, most people on Facebook are dull as sandpaper.

How many of your Facebook friends, never post an update and have nothing on their site except notices that they are "now friends with?" They find friends, friends find them and that's the end of it. Snore.

I mean, that's why they had to develop those quizzes. Remember back in the 60's when couples would have dinner parties and realize that they had the most boring life on the planet - so boring no one at the party had even one good story to tell, so they had to dig the Monopoly game out of the closet or if they were flexible or drunk on martinis, Twister.

Likewise Facebook, when left to the actual people who use it is so dull the games have to be brought out. Yes, Facebook is the dinner party in this scenario, and the Facebook friends are the boring guests, so boring I might add that the quizzes created to lure them out of the dark corner of the school auditorium attempt to make them look more interesting than they are. What dead rock star are you? I mean, nothing excites me more than finding out one of my past coworkers animal guide is a Lion or what they did to get thrown out of Walmart. Really. Makes my day.

And best of all, I love the people who use the Status option to shower us with a daily quote. Usually the quote reflects absolutely nothing about the personality of the person delivering it. For example the other day, one of my Facebook friends (not to be confused with the real ones) delivered her much anticipated Quote of The Day :

"It takes seventeen muscles to smile and forty-three to frown."

I have never in real life seen this woman smile. Never. Not even once. She is probably the most unhappy person I know.

However, come to think about it, she does have very well toned facial muscles.

Author's Note: There are no pictures on these posts because I am using Dave's Mac and I do not know how to do anything on here - I am totally i-dumb. My computer crashed and thankfully most of my stuff can be saved and I am getting a new one and should be back to normal soon. Ok, not normal, but you know. It's been a challenging week - more on that later.


  1. I think there's a quiz you can take on Facebook that tells you what cocktail you are! I don't know for sure. I'm new to it all!


  2. I was just wondering yesterday why people ask me to be their friend then never, ever say anything to me. These are people I knew 'back in the day' but have not spoken to them in years. I wouldn't speak to them IRL or on facebook. I approve them as friends just so I don't hurt their feelings.


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