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Thursday, October 29, 2009

I'm Really Glad I'm Not Married to Criss Angel

Yes, today I'm very glad I'm married to Dave and not Criss. If I were married to Criss, he might have asked me to help with one of his stunts. He might try to persuade me like this,

"Honey. It's easy. You just lie down and I pull you apart. You don't have to do anything, just lie there. I do all the work. Besides, you'll get paid."

And you know, because I like to make my husband happy I'd probably say ok. Next thing you know I'm in pieces and he's off with one of his goth groupies who would never ever agree to help him with anything except the spending of the money.

So I'm glad I'm not married to Criss Angel. Instead I'm married to Dave who volunteered me to do a voice over because his client needed an everyday average person to be the voice of some woman who once wrote a letter to a financial institution, telling them about her positive experience with the organization and now they are using this testimonial as part of some promotional material and using my voice and hopefully I'll never hear the end result anywhere because I heard a little bit of my recording today and it reminded me of the time I got my first tape recorder and realized that my voice sounded nothing on the outside like it sounds from the inside.

Anyway, the voice over gig (listen to me will you?) was a lot less stressful than being tied to something and waiting to be pulled apart. Instead I got to sit in a small dark booth, put on headphones and read into a microphone. And if I did have a better voice I'd probably try to make money at it for real because I got to wear jeans to work and I didn't even have to pretend I know Excel.

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